blue mondays

mummy gave me a long pep talk on monday to quell my inner demons and satiate the longing need for an intellectual talk with someone.

her words remain as a constant reminder to the surreal presence of His hand in my life today without forgetting the past i was removed from.

i havent been very honest of late. i've been keeping too many details from too many people. there was an initial surge of guilt, but i've come to terms with it, realizing that there's no obligation whatsoever to tell people who actually ask. in fact, there isnt even a need to do so, since it doesnt benefit any purpose, whether in me or in the latter party's.

what mummy told me was right. and it sounds naive on my part, but i was unable to discern between the trustworthy and the non. je suis fatigue.

darryl d once told us this during a lecture, ' when i first stepped into this lecture theatre, a already gave you my trust. you never had to earn it, you already had it. someone had to take the initiative in this whole issue of trust, and all i want to say is, why not you? '

bless his merry soul, his words, stuck like glue in my head, continue to resonate everytime i meet someone new. its not about placating a person or saying nice flowery, honeyed words. but its a matter of being sincere, being honest and being open in heart and in mind.

some may ask, who am i to speak about values, and frankly, i cant tell you who i am or any credentials that i have, just that i am spencer. period.